For most people, a 29th birthday is marked with fear and worry as the sunlight of your 20s starts to dim and the big Three-Oh starts to peek over the horizon to the east. Aimee however decided to mark my 29th birthday with a surprise trip to Scotland’s capital. I suppose to take my mind off it.
Twice before I’ve visited Scotland, and both times I have driven straight through the Lowlands, bypassed the major cities and headed straight into the wildness of the Highlands. So, I was pretty excited to actually visit a place in Scotland where there were people – even if my birthday falls in January and there are currently some covid restrictions up there.
We travelled up on the train. Petrol prices nowadays are woeful, so going up by railway was cheaper and faster, and you don’t have to find an expensive multi-storey to park a train for three days – Avanti West Coast kinda sort that out for you. As it’s January, scrimping is the name of the game, so our Edinburgh To-Do List would include some free attractions.
Aimee booked the hotel way in advance so we got a good deal on it.
Moxy Edinburgh Fountainbridge is about a 20 minute walk from the centre and the Castle. There’s a bar on the ground floor, the staff are lovely and the room was nicely equipped, with air-con, a great shower and noise-cancelling windows. They even left me a message on the mirror.
With bags dropped off there was only one thing to do first. Go wander.
Castle Rock. A royal castle has stood on this ancient volcanic plug since the reign of David I (great name) in the 12th Century. Edinburgh Castle is Scotland’s most visited paid tourist attraction, and tickets for adults are £15.50 which tbf, isn’t TOO bad. But for now, we were content with enjoying the views from the castle esplanade.
It was a bit windy.
We headed down Castlehill towards the Royal Mile. Between the castle and the Tolbooth Kirk (the top of the Gothic spire is the highest point in central Edinburgh), you can find the Camera Obscura and World of Illusions.
I was up for going until I saw the prices. £18.95 for an adult. Crikey. So it’s more expensive than visiting the historic castle next door. I suppose that’s the modern world we live in – history is less valuable to consumers than Instagramability.
We had to make do with mirrors outside.
The Royal Mile is the main thoroughfare of the Old Town, stretching between the castle and Holyrood Palace. In the summer (especially during the Edinburgh International Festival), these streets are absolutely packed. But covid and the cool climate meant we had it almost to ourselves.
Humans were almost outnumbered by owls.
Soon, I accidentally stumbled across a street I had on my “Must-Do” list.
Cockburn Street. Apart from the pretty architecture, it looks fairly innocuous, but fans of the MCU will recognise it from Infinity War, where Wanda and Vision are attacked by Thanos’ Black Order.
From one fandom to another, I sought out a pub called The Waverley on St Mary’s Street.
I’m a fan of the Elis James & John Robins podcast, and this is John’s favourite pub in Edinburgh. The decor is very early-20th Century. The ceiling and walls of upstairs and the stairwell are plastered in gig and show posters dating back decades.
Alas, tonight was not the night to enjoy too many ales in this classic pub. The day after we had planned (in my opinion) the best free activity you can do in Edinburgh…
Climbing Arthur’s Seat
Time for the first hike of the year! And it’s a rather quirky hike – for one, how many hikes have you been on that include a Sainsbury’s Local on the trail?
We set off at 7am and walked through the quiet Scottish streets for 30 minutes before reaching the Dynamic Earth, which is overlooked by the hulking dark mass of Arthur’s Seat.
Btw, if you’re interested, getting into Dynamic Earth will cost an adult £15.95, and offers you a 4D adventure into deep time to discover the origins of the Earth. It does interest me a lot, but at this moment I was on my own adventure into deep time as ahead lay an extinct volcano.
We entered Holyrood Park and left the bustle of city life behind. This route to the summit (an elevation of 251m) is the most gentle, and the path is easy to traverse but for a few rough rocky parts. The darkness obviously hindered us, and we had to be extra careful in placing our steps.
The goal was simple: reach the summit before the sun did, and before it got busy later in the day.
Soon, we were high enough to look out over the Firth of Forth, and back over Edinburgh.
From the Holyrood Gait (no, I’ve not mispellt that…) it takes just 30 minutes to hike to the top.
When we were there, the wind hit us.
Dress accordingly!
A handful of people had had our idea of catching the sunrise. We found a place on the rocks to sit and wait.
The conditions had been promising; dark starry skies had turned an ever lightening blue, but for the one line of clouds in one direction – you’ve guessed it – the east!
We sat and waited for 20 minutes, knowing that this wasn’t going to be as spectacular as I’d hoped. Aimee was freezing so we made a move. As we descended, the sun finally popped over the cloud.
Ah well, it is January and I shouldn’t be complaining about a little bit of cloud in Scotland. It’s a success! Sort of.
We took a different route to the bottom cos I wanted to see Salisbury Crags.
Oh wait, this wouldn’t be a hike with Aimee if I didn’t point out how her utterly appropriate footwear was faring…
Our next destination was the piece de resistance, the cherry on the cake, the ultimate end goal. We headed back into the city centre, passing the Scott Monument on the way.
It is the second largest monument to a writer in the world and stands opposite Edinburgh’s Waverley railway station – a name inspired by Sir Walter Scott’s novels.
It’s also really near the final destination of our dawn walk.
McMuffins never tasted so good.
We headed back to the hotel for showers and new clothes before venturing back into town for our next activity.
I love history and I love an open top bus tour. It’s a great way to see a city’s landmarks and learn about them whilst the wind blows through your hair. We chose Bright Bus as a 24-hour hop-on-hop-off ticket was £10. Bargain. The tour begins at St Andrew’s Square and takes a circular route around the city, lasting about an hour. You can hop off at any time and another bus will eventually come along to hop back on. The voice in the earphone was a Scot who liked to make some sassy remarks about the government and the English. I liked that.
I didn’t like the couple who joined us on the top deck. At first, they asked Aimee to take a photo of them both – which is absolutely fair! But then began the shocking behaviour.
WTF are you DOING? Why are you posing for your 12 followers like you’re challenge me to a Pokémon battle? Oooooh look at me I’m so candid. Honestly, to the people who go travelling just so they can take pictures of themselves, go to bed. Her whipped boyfriend was all over the backseat trying to find those perfect angles, whilst the bus was moving. One jolty acceleration and he would have toppled out of the bus. I neither confirm or deny that I wanted this to happen.
Anyway, where was I? Oh yes, using the tour bus to see the city, not to try and get a sponsored Gram post.
The National Museum of Scotland. For those of you who have a taste for culture and sophistication (and those of you who pretend so your Facebook friends and followers think you’re more interesting than you are), then Edinburgh offers many attractions such as the Scottish National Gallery and the National Museum of Scotland. Entry to such places is FREE, but a donation is encouraged.
Once again, I was aware of how lucky we were that it wasn’t raining, but still – this is Scotland, so I was eventually cold of course.
The Scottish Parliament Building at Holyrood. It’s design has won architectural awards but public opinion is divided on its aesthetics. My mum says it looks like the crash site of a spaceship.
I’m siding with her. Compared to the majesty of Westminster Palace, this is awful. Its windows look like they should be filled with post-it notes, empty bottles and students sticking their heads out for cheeky fags, not Scottish ministers. Even the tour guide on earphones made a cheeky comment.
Back at St Andrew’s Square, we decided to splash out at on food.
I’ve heard many good things about The Ivy but I’ve never been to one. It was my birthday trip, I suppose. I ordered lobster linguine with tomatoes and chilli for £29.95 and this was my meal.
I get it, lobster is expensive, but is that it?! Jeez. I don’t think the middle-class life is for me. I should’ve gone Spoons.
So we went Spoons. You just cannot knock a Spoons. It is what it is. I had a lovely Scottish winter ale before heading back.
I think we were in bed for 7pm. ROCK AND ROLLLLLLL.
The next morning we tried to do a bit of shopping but guess what, all the shops up here are the same as the ones in England – who knew?! The only differences are those tourist traps aimed at fools with full wallets. We found a couple of sweet shops on Princes Street with hugely inflated prices, like a standard energy drink costing £4. No thanks.
At Waverley Station there is an underground mall that reminded me of Salford precinct. It’s just a standard shopping centre and the only thing of interest in there for us was a McDonald’s, where burgers are served with human hair.
I really enjoyed pulling this from between my lips. Mmmmmmmm.
We took a walk through Princes Street Gardens.
Again, I appreciated that it was January. Yes, the grey sky makes everything look a bit grim, but the lack of people adds to the homely feeling of the city. This is the Edinburgh the locals see, not the tourists.
The Gardens lead into the churchyard of the Church of St Cuthbert.
In true Karl Pilkington style, we went for a wander through the gravestones.
We saw no ghosts. Edinburgh is famous for its ghosts so of course, that night we booked ourselves on a spooky tour of the Underground Vaults.
Our guide Andrew met us on Castlehill and led us through the streets of the capital, with tales of murder, execution and excrement.
In the Vaults, we were shown some lovely medieval torture devices. Then we headed into the darkness to listen to dark history and ghost stories.
Though I don’t believe in ghosts, I love history; the tour was very interesting and Andrew was very insightful. Tickets including the Torture Exhibition cost £14.
https://www.getyourguide.co.uk/edinburgh-l44/the-original-underground-tour-edinburgh-t47520/
All those tales of blood and gore had made me hungry so we headed to a Scottish pub for a Scottish meal.
The Albanach on the Royal Mile was the first place we found that did the one meal I wanted above all others: haggis. I absolutely love haggis and this pub did a “Haggis & Potato Pie” – haggis and cheddar on top of neeps and tatties. It was so good I forgot to take a photo before it was too eaten.
On the way back to the hotel, we visited the last place on my to-do list: Greyfriars Bobby.
This is Edinburgh’s smallest listed structure, and commemorates a Skye Terrier from the 19th Century, who is said to have guarded the grave of his owner in the nearby Greyfriars Kirkyard for 14 years. It’s traditional that touching Bobby’s nose will give you good luck.
When Bobby himself died, he was buried in front of Greyfriars Kirk.
His story inspired a Walt Disney film and those I know who have watched it say it will make you cry.
And on that note, there wasn’t much more for us to do in Scotland’s capital! We went to bed, woke up, checked out and walked the scenic route to Waverley Station via the castle – where we finally saw a man with bagpipes.
How nice of him to play us out.
Three nights in Edinburgh and it didn’t rain on us once. May that good fortune (and that from Bobby’s nose) continue for the rest of 2022!
#VidOnTour 